First off, I hope you got to watch my video last night on how to get a bigger trouser snake....

 

It caused quite a bit of conversation in the comment section, and YES it was a legit question I answered...

 

Why did I answer it??? Because I have NO shame in answering any question you have in regards to issues of Masculinity, Strength, and Awesomeness...

 

 

How Much Do You Bench?

Four Strategies For Improving Your Bench Press and Developing Upper Body Mass  

Cole Streets B.S., CSCS 

How much do you bench? This is always the first question that one washed-up meathead asks another upon first encounter at the local Globo Gym. What has spurred this obsession with the bench press? I have asked myself this question many times. Could it be that the bench press is the ultimate test of a man's strength and metal? No, I would argue that the back squat and deadlift are far better measures of total body strength and testicular fortitude. Is it because nothing gets the ladies going like knowing that a man can press heavy weight? Definitely not, females tend to value other qualities (rugged sex appeal, sweet mustaches, and money) more than a big bench. It must be because the bench press is fun and who gives a damn about what your legs look like anyway! After all, everyone knows that wearing shirts with sleeves is just a pathetic attempt to cover up the spindles that you are trying to pass off as arms. Nothing in my wardrobe has sleeves anymore; even my suits are sleeveless. I go no sleeves and cuffs, like a Chip 'n Dale. What employer wouldn't want to hire me wearing such a sweet suit? The bench press is a great movement that most men want to excel at, however, it is often misunderstood and improperly executed. This is why I have provided four strategies for improving your bench press and in doing so developing serious upper body mass and strength.  

Strategy 1: Proper Technique 

The bench press is not simply an upper body movement. It's a total body movement that is just as much about your hips as it is your chest. Using proper technique will allow you to lift heavier weight and help to protect against injury. This will ultimately result in greater gains in strength and size. 

Power Bench Press Technique: 

• Push your feet hard into the floor and drive yourself back into the bench.
• Arch you back hard and squeeze your glutes. Your training partner should be able to slide his arm underneath you arch.
• Keep your glutes in contact with the bench the entire time.
• Squeeze your shoulder blades together and dig into the bench.
• Grip the bar where it feels most natural; just be sure to not go too narrow or too wide.
• Wrap your thumbs around the bar and squeeze as hard as you can.
• Attempt to pull the bar apart. This will engage your upper back.
• Lock your wrists like when throwing a punch.
• Take a deep breath and push your stomach out. Hold this for the entire rep.
• Unrack the bar and pull it into your groove using your upper back. Do not unrack the bar by pressing out with your chest and triceps or raising your shoulders.
• Tuck your elbows in. This will engage your triceps and protect your shoulders.
• Lower the bar quickly, but under control.
• Touch between the bottom of your sternum and belly button.
• Explosively push the bar back up in a straight line, not back over the face. This path is a shorter distance and requires no shoulder rotation.
• Everything should be tight and I mean everything.

 

Strategy 2: Emphasize Triceps 

A properly executed bench press is a triceps dominant movement. The primary movements of the pectoralis major are shoulder flexion (think front raise) and horizontal adduction (think dumbbell fly). The pecs do contribute; just not as much as most meatheads give them credit for. The triceps however, are powerful extensors that contribute significantly to lockout strength. If you don't believe me, then believe Louie Simmons who says, "The strongest muscle must be the triceps. A set of thick lats and upper back are next. The delts, especially rear, are next. The chest will take care of itself". In addition to improving your bench press, emphasizing triceps in your training will help you to forge Hulk Hogan-esque arms. The triceps make up approximately 2/3 of the muscle mass in the upper arm. All of the little Hulkster's know that the ultimate goal in life is to have 24inch pythons and that the best way to accomplish it is to Hulk up and include a high volume of triceps work in your supplemental training. 

Strategy 3: Develop the Upper Back 

Just because you can't see it doesn't mean that you should ignore it. Developing a strong upper back has numerous advantages. It improves the structural integrity of the shoulder joint and helps to reduce injuries. Most meatheads are internally rotated and have a significant imbalance between their anterior and posterior chain. This is because they have done considerably more pressing than pulling. Strengthening the musculature of the upper back will protect the shoulder by pulling everything back into the correct anatomical position. Having a strong and thick upper back also improves the stability and efficiency of your press. It allows you to maintain a good arch in your upper back and keep your shoulder blades retracted. In addition, a wide back is aesthetically pleasing and gives you the classic v-contour that women covet.  

Strategy 4: Periodization 

People fail, systems don't. If you want to see prolonged gains, your training needs to be organized and you need to have a periodization model in place. The conjugate method (Westside) is an effective way to develop strength and size. Rotating the core movement will force you to become strong through different movement patterns and ranges of motion. Using this system you will train upper body twice per week. If your goal is muscular hypertrophy, I suggest replacing dynamic effort upper with a sub-maximal or repetitive effort.    
 

Sample Max-Effort Upper 

 
 

Bonus Strategy: If all else fails, just layback and push. 

I hope that this article introduced you to some new concepts or reinforced the importance of others. Employ these strategies in your training and the next time some meathead asks you, "How much do you bench?" you'll actually be telling the truth when you respond with an outrageous number.